Relic Community Quotes Database

<soul|FL> its tough knowing that the fish are having more sex then i am

<Akranadas> Tire is sexy

<soul|FL> you know after watching lotr i really want to have sex with an elf
<soul|FL> i think that would be fun

<soul|FL> i thought kat was gay thats why she was with hor:/
<{ceejayoz}> or did Horizon turn her gay?
<soul|FL> maybe kats a man
<Horizon> a sexy man

<Zepherian> ping pong, you know, soul's tennis

<ranga> i still cant believe the guy cheated on me
<ranga> off of
<ranga> i mean
<ranga> rofl
<ranga> shit
<ranga> that was a bad slip

<eTombotron> reki stop being an asshole
<eTombotron> you already made me cry twice

<Hand> hey [insert name]

<Skwerl|MICROBIOLOGEEEEEEE> blackstar, masturbation kills kitties
<Skwerl|MICROBIOLOGEEEEEEE> oh gawd =(
<BlackStar> I know.
<BlackStar> I embrace their genocide.
<bonnet> roflol
<Aegeri`NWNtool> It's like when someone says if you don't believe in fairies, one dies
<pH14> with a box of kleenex?
<Aegeri`NWNtool> So my friend ran around shouting it all day
<naradaman> haha
<Aegeri`NWNtool> He wanted a "Fairy" solution

DrRawkBot (Relic): Aaaahhh! He skipped the second NIS with the crazy over-the-top airplane explosion.

Everytime an NIS is skipped, the game pages me directly. I round up a group of animators and we show up at your door with a sledgehammer. The sledgehammer is used to smash your ESC key to smithereens.

<Chrysophylax> I am a very high-quality woman. I know that sounds arrogant, but let's consider the facts:
<Silentium> did you tell the kids the story of The Thing?
<Chrysophylax> I should've put quotes
<ColonelAFK> Chrysophylax is a woman?
<Silentium> wait, you're a chick?
<ColonelAFK> LIAR
<Chrysophylax> ._.
<Silentium> WHAT IS GOING ON!
<RetroLaddie> Silentium - no.
<ColonelAFK> YOURE A BALDING 50 YEAR OLD WITH A BIG BELLY
<Beast> LMAO

*** Pijama is now known as Pijama|Shower
<darkelf> I'm generally way of the mark on stuff like this
<Tails> I can rest easy knowing that Pijama is taking a shower
<darkelf> you can also rest easy knowing that I'll soon be on my way to take a shit
*** darkelf is now known as darkelf|shitting
<Tails> and I think I might shave
<Tails> but I don't want want to write "Tails|shaving" because #homeworld will get the wrong idea

<soul> squid
<soul> game starting
<soul> 20 minutes
<NovaBurn> ?
<NovaBurn> game of what
<soul> chicago bears vs seattle seahawks
<NovaBurn> oh that
<soul> and its at soldier field
<soul> glad the trip is in march
<soul> all the college bowls will be over
<soul> march = march madness.. but wont miss the final four ncaa
<soul> wow
<soul> i am talking to 16 people who absolutely cant give a shit:\
* soul slaps Squid|laundry around a bit with a large trout
<soul> except you squid
<soul> that game better be on in your living room
<Squid|laundry> wha?
<Squid|laundry> :D
* soul is now known as sgame
<Squid|laundry> For every living room I have, the game will be on in it
<fisher|archer> you need more living rooms to be a true fan then

<SquidDNA> [15:31] <a> im looking around, but GM has provided no information on the chev volt's speed ratings
<SquidDNA> [15:31] <a> oh hay you can drive 40 miles on electricity! but only at 10mph.
<SquidDNA> [15:31] <a> will i still get 40miles if i drive at 80mph?
<SquidDNA> [15:32] <SquidDNA> yes
<SquidDNA> [15:32] <SquidDNA> But for half an hour
<SquidDNA> Actually that doesn't really make sense nevermind
<egid> hhahahah
<egid> maths + electricity = WHAT
<SquidDNA> Well I just realized I had answered it as "you will only get 40 miles for half an hour"
<SquidDNA> Which
<SquidDNA> Doesn't make any sense
<SquidDNA> At all
<SquidDNA> IF YOU GO SLOWER IT IS MORE ECONOMICAL, YOU GET 40 MILES FOR 4 HOURS at 10 MPH
<egid> hahaha
<egid> the phrasing is fucked
<egid> 20 if a woman lifts
<SquidDNA> you mean if she drives ;\
<SquidDNA> All those wrong turns
<egid> hahaha

<Silentium> i server people at starfucks, so i need a voice
<Silentium> *starbucks

<Hablacraja> IT'S THE FEDS
* Hablacraja thermites his hard drive
<BlackStar> Why thermite when you can just expose it to intense magnetic forces?
<Water> hmm, i'm surprised you are still here habla
<BlackStar> Less suspicious than a smoldering pile of metal.
<Water> usually a complete incineration of one's hard drive would mean instantaneous removal from IRC
<BlackStar> Nah
<Water> unless habla is magic
*** Mirehn (PherrisKal@hwc-5C839F45.socal.res.rr.com) has joined #homeworld.
<BlackStar> Wizzard Powered
<Jal-18> habla is connected via his MIND
<Water> hmm, he has access to a "matrix?"
<Jal-18> he is one with irc
<Jal-18> channels dance across his skin
<Jal-18> and kickbans tickle his nose
<BlackStar> Then let us make tubgirl and tentacle hentai links one with habla.
<Hablacraja> they already are

<Linuturk> I got a question for everyone; would you use a wireless ball mouse or a wired laser mouse?
<Zepherian> the only balls I would use next to a computer envolve a porn site and johnsons baby oil

<Hablacraja> i haven't bathed in 18 days.
<pH14> habla showers using the wetnaps from his KFC lunches
* sidewinder goes down on Habla

<iNyyti> haha, imagine if I really was a girl
<i-havenoideap0k> it's not a great stretch of the imagination nyyti really

<sleep> i mean ask anyone.. who among us has not an experience go bad
<sleep> say.. they move to colorado or montana.. and maybe become a lesbian
<sleep> am i right fellas
<sleep> riight
<sleep> hello
<Inq> errr Soul
<Inq> what are you on?
<sleep> your mother
<sleep> hahahahhahahaha
<NovaBurn> hahahahaah
* NovaBurn high fives soul
<sleep> sober:(
<sleep> so anyway like i said
<sleep> moral and ethical:)

<LeftWing> I've had thin and high ones: Damn hard to get up.

<Caesar> stalker is scaring the beejezus out of me
<Hablacraja> pussbitch

<&Mnementh> if your balls dont touch it isnt gay
<GenAmonX2K> if your balls don't touch then what's the point?

* smaaaaalllmonkert has joined #homeworld
<smaaaaalllmonkert> hi again
<Gaz> who are you?
<Riess> no.
<smaaaaalllmonkert> last time i try to i get picture of pope
<Riess> no.
<smaaaaalllmonkert> fixed
<Riess> no.
<smaaaaalllmonkert> shut up
<Gaz> answer,or Riess will consume your ears
<smaaaaalllmonkert> i did
<smaaaaalllmonkert> oh
<smaaaaalllmonkert> i am smaaaaalllmonket
* Someguy|office has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
<smaaaaalllmonkert> dammit i need a wiki page
<smaaaaalllmonkert> ok try to guess who i am again
<smaaaaalllmonkert> i'll give a clue
* Someguy|office has joined #homeworld
<DarkGul> attentionwhore?
<Gaz> are you
<Gaz> Lionel Blair?
<smaaaaalllmonkert> my avatar reads hello cthulhu fhtagn
<Gaz> Anwar Sadat?
<smaaaaalllmonkert> no you idiot
* TheShadow has quit IRC (Quit: omg noes)
<Gaz> Gough Whitlam?
<Gaz> RICHARD SIMMONS?
<smaaaaalllmonkert> actually i dont have the heart to blame myself on poor tire so continue... not simmons
* Mnementh has quit IRC (Quit: sleep!)
<smaaaaalllmonkert> if i told you who i was would i receive an award?
<Gaz> umm...yes
<smaaaaalllmonkert> what kind?
<Gaz> you will have to wait and see
* BlackStar has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
<Woggy> an oscar
<Woggy> and everlasting fame
<Riess> and we'll set you on fire
<Riess> just a little though
<smaaaaalllmonkert> hmmm
<smaaaaalllmonkert> ok
<smaaaaalllmonkert> i just messaged druidika with my identity
<smaaaaalllmonkert> now get him to tell you
<Gaz> O_o
<smaaaaalllmonkert> what
<smaaaaalllmonkert> ok fine
<smaaaaalllmonkert> ill tell you a story
<smaaaaalllmonkert> once a pon a time
<smaaaaalllmonkert> there was a man who was called barn
<smaaaaalllmonkert> he went to work
* Wrkncacnter has joined #homeworld
<Wrkncacnter> hi folks
* Shoe has joined #homeworld
<smaaaaalllmonkert> and met Wrkncacnter
<smaaaaalllmonkert> and Shoe
* smaaaaalllmonkert was kicked by Gaz (The End?)
<Shoe> Hiyas!
<Riess> lo
* smaaaaalllmonkert has joined #homeworld
<smaaaaalllmonkert> no
<smaaaaalllmonkert> the story will continue
<smaaaaalllmonkert> he was kicked out by Gaz
<smaaaaalllmonkert> but he re-entered the building
<Wrkncacnter> who set mode +m?
* Caesa1 has joined #homeworld
<smaaaaalllmonkert> and found Caesa1 in the filing cabinet
<Gaz> no one has Wkrn
<smaaaaalllmonkert> caesa1 gave him the keys and the silenced pistol
<smaaaaalllmonkert> barn travelled through the building collecting evidence
* BlackStar has joined #homeworld
<smaaaaalllmonkert> then BlackStar appeared holding a flamethrower
<BlackStar> huh?
<BlackStar> I left?
<Wrkncacnter> of course not gaz, the statement itself proves that :D
<smaaaaalllmonkert> barn fired a few shots but BlackStar made it to the alarm!
<Riess> +m sounds like a really good idea though
<smaaaaalllmonkert> barn threw himself back down the stairs, hats flying everywhere
* Caesar has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
<smaaaaalllmonkert> guards came fluttering from every opening and started firing madly at each other
* Shoe has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
<Gaz> ...
<smaaaaalllmonkert> barn then smashed headlong into a photocopier which promptly exploded
<smaaaaalllmonkert> Gaz was picked up like a rag doll and flew out the window.
* Shoe has joined #homeworld
* smaaaaalllmonkert was kicked by Gaz (Quit the jibber-jabber)
* smaaaaalllmonkert has joined #homeworld
<smaaaaalllmonkert> ok now we need Gaz to be kicked because it's unrealistic otherwise
<smaaaaalllmonkert> i'll continue nonetheless
* Water has joined #homeworld
* Gaz sets mode: +o Riess
* SquidDNA sets mode: +b *aaa*monk*!*@*
* smaaaaalllmonkert has quit IRC (Client exited)
* SquidDNA sets mode: -b *monket*!*@*
* smaaaaalllmenket has joined #homeworld
<Gaz> thank you Squid
<smaaaaalllmenket> and back to the story
<SquidDNA> hmm
* smaaaaalllmenket was kicked by Riess (die.)
<SquidDNA> Deficient ban
* smaaaaalllmenket has joined #homeworld
<SquidDNA> This allows me to refine my technique
<smaaaaalllmenket> KICKS DONT STOP IT
* Gaz sets mode: +b *!*@hwc-73364491.com
* SquidDNA sets mode: -b *!*@hwc-73364491.com
* smaaaaalllmenket was kicked by Gaz (silence)
<SquidDNA> Don't ban the server Gaz ;)
<Zepherian> today's WTF moment was sponsored by the NHL
<Gaz> whoops
* SquidDNA sets mode: +b *aaa*!*@*
<Riess> hahah
* Catachan has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
* SquidDNA sets mode: -b+b *aaa*monk*!*@* *monk*!*@*
<Water> just ip ban him
<Riess> shotgun ban
<SquidDNA> There
<Riess> can't
<Wrkncacnter> banning, it's an art
<Riess> his IP = webclient
<SquidDNA> He's using the webclient
* REKI has joined #homeworld
<Gaz> he'll come in under a new nick
<Water> hi woggy
<REKI> HI THERE IM REKI
* REKI was kicked by SquidDNA (SquidDNA)
<Riess> orly
<Laura> lol
<Gaz> now he's impersonating popular long standing dolts
<Riess> did we ever find out wtf his major malfunction is?
<Gaz> he must be MINCED
<SquidDNA> Oh wait
<Water> yes Riess
<Water> he's 14 years old
<Water> nuff said
<Riess> oh
<SquidDNA> This will take some advanced fu
<Riess> ok
<Zepherian> just poison his meals
<Wrkncacnter> done
<Laura> done poisoning?
<Water> is he too old for you to eat, Zeph?
<Laura> that was fast
<Wrkncacnter> i anticipated the request
<SquidDNA> How do you set maximum users
<Wrkncacnter> so his happy meal is not quite so happy around now
<Riess> uh oh, Squid's bringing on the big guns#
* _ has joined #homeworld
* _ was kicked by Riess (no.)
<Laura> alert :P
<Laura> XD
<Shoe> we dont have poison
<outtis> I'm tired
<-Gaz:#homeworld-> Full Alert,evil ops
<SquidDNA> Moe could use the Frohwn on him
<Riess> that would own
<SquidDNA> Moe has an evil spell
<outtis> my eyes are tired
<Wrkncacnter> being german?
<outtis> but my body isn't
<SquidDNA> That force joins the target to over 200 randomly generated channels
<SquidDNA> Often it crashes the client
<Zepherian> I solved it by limiting channels chatside
<Zepherian> since ive been hit with this retarded bullshit before
* frstkor13 has joined #homeworld
<frstkor13> im ag ay
<Riess> sure, but you're not on the web client :D
* frstkor13 was kicked by SquidDNA (SquidDNA)
<Zepherian> good point
<Laura> he's persistent :|
<Gaz> omg
* Code has joined #homeworld
<Wrkncacnter> we here on the webclient lack such fancy features
<Riess> I say let him in
* Code was kicked by SquidDNA (SquidDNA)
<Riess> he'll grow bored eventually
<Woggy> lol
<Laura> I think that was code :o
<Gaz> lol,was that the real code?
<Riess> no
<SquidDNA> NEIN
<SquidDNA> WE CAN'T BE SURE
<Water> rofl
<Laura> but he is in the server already
<SquidDNA> THEY LOOK LIKE US NOW
<Riess> HE WAS A CYLON
<Laura> :|

<Elukka> i'm sick so im home and boredom is taking over
<Tails> entertain yourself
* Fixer-at-work has joined #homeworld
<Tails> by telling me a story
<Tails> here ill start it
<Tails> This is the story of Grodon the Spack
<Elukka> who travelled the endless voids of spacelol.
<Fixer-at-work> To search for the power of the ultimate ROFL.
<Elukka> however
<Tails> Grodon was a homely fellow, and never quite quick on the draw
<Tails> His transport consisted of a crew including himself and his loyal partner Red
<Tails> Red, although a tad more intelligent than Grodon, was too annoying to function in society
<Elukka> Red was one of the elusive beings called Ninjapirates
<Fixer-at-work> Brutally scarred for life in the conflict against the Cannibal Vikings.
<Elukka> One day, Grodon thought he had finally found the ultimate ROFL
<Void> but it was just a LOL
<Elukka> Nevertheless, a console on the transport exploded of laugter.
<Elukka> *laughter
<Fixer-at-work> Leading to an inquest as to why all the consoles in the main bridge were filled with highly explosive materials.
<Elukka> It was revealed to be an assassination attempt by..
<Void> blood sucking robot ninjas
<Void> on the order of...
<Elukka> DYN, the master of the universe
<Void> It turned out that Red is the last Ninjapirate
<Void> the only one capable of challenging Dyn
<Void> using his magic sword of lollerskates
<Elukka> After a long and hard journey, Grodon and Red finally arrived at the Throne of the Universe, Where Capital Letters Were Used to Emphasise its Importance
<Fixer-at-work> Shocked to discover that someone had left the seat up, and it hadn't been cleaned for months.
<Elukka> They found a note, explaining that Dyn was no longer Star God and had proceeded to rule some corner of a network known as the Intarwebs
<Elukka> because being the master of the universe was way too much work.
<Fixer-at-work> Although the wages of sin were death, the hours were good and you got full dental.